Here is a little history.. Portland Oregon where all of us posters currently live (except for Grue who is in Japan cause he has such a fine taste for the bukkake) is known as the rose city. I live within 2 miles of the Rose Garden Arena, inwhich I take the Rose Quarter exit when i come home from work, we have rose parades, rose festivals, roses growing in all the parks, hell when I'm outside at those parks my cheeks get rosie.. Hey we are known as the city of roses. We also have a radio station that goes by the name of Rosie 105. Now think a local radio station in Portland Oregon the city of Roses, where did they get that name? (processing.... processing.. done....) Ahhh yes! It must be named after the city, Portland the Rose City. Not according to Rosie O'Donell's lawyers.
From Oregonian:

"There was no intention to be associated with Rosie O'Donnell," he said. "We're not using 'Rosie' to create confusion among our listeners."

O'Donnell's lawyers, however, say use of the name is an attempt to capitalize on O'Donnell's fame. "It is virtually certain," the suit claims, "that consumers of Rosie O'Donnell's television show will be drawn to defendants' Rosie radio station in the mistaken belief that defendants' Rosie broadcast entertainment emanates from the same source as plaintiff's Rosie broadcast."

In a lawsuit filed in Tacoma federal court, the companies are asking Entercom, the Pennsylvania-based radio station chain that owns KRSK, to quit using the "Rosie" nickname and pay triple damages for its unauthorized use in promotions.

Bust out the chips and dip, and throw one some chains and whips. I got a raise, I got a raise! Oh lord oh mighty I got a raise. It's not much only $.54 but its a raise and I get retro paid for about 4 months. (thats when they where suppose to give it to me). So I figure with this raise instead of eatting random things I find off the ground each hour, I can each a bag of chips or a candy bar each hour on the hour that I work (as long as it costs $.54).

In respone to Weishaupt's first post I would like to say yes it is all my fault. I just had such a fun time this weekend over at Weishaupt's Wonderland and all that pressure to play Quake was just too much....
Sorry....

Here's file footage from my weekend at the "Wonderland"

Well gotta run! The "Establishment" calls!!

Gotta go catch a plane, but here's something amusing to keep you on the marginal edge of entertainment. Be sure to tell me if you can figure out what exactly is taking place in this instructional and informative clip.

I think a good gift for the president would be a chocolate revolver. And since he's so busy, you'd probably have to run up to him and hand it to him.

Well, I didn't get a damn thing done this weekend. I blame Josh. Dammit, Josh. There's a pretty popular quake mod called Instagib that's been taking up most of my time. No health, no weapons, nothing but railguns, railguns, railguns. I'm gonna be railing people in my dreams tonight. I downloaded Magnolia from our good friend and friendly warez distributor Biznich over the weekend, and in true Weishaupt fashion I never got around to watching it. Ah well, I'll try to burn it and take it with me. I leave tomorrow for dreary, dismal DC for yet two more weeks of dullness, so drop me a message on my pager - it makes me feel "wired."

Sunday, Jan 30th, 2000

Curch attendance is at an all-time low and every store in town is sold out of nacho-cheese pork rinds, so it must be Superbowl Sunday. I'd just like everyone to remember to say a little prayer in hopes that we'll get some really aesthetically pleasing injuries this afternoon. Maybe a splintered femur, or some bright red arterial spray. I root for that stuff. It's a good thing I'm not a football announcer, because every time the quarterback took an especially brutal hit, I'd break a stalk of celery into the microphone and shout, "Sign that man up for unemployment, cause his career's OVER!" Maybe we could even set up a half-time extravaganza centered around great injuries from past Superbowl matchups, but I might be hoping for too much on that one.

Hey Weishaupt its good to have you back home for a few. Just to clear things up, I'm 21 and of legal age to guzzle 40's, 22's, pints, pitchers, shots and what have you, not that it stopped me before. Course weis would know he bought me my first drink on my 21st bday, a good ol Cement Mixer or a Semen Mixer, kinda fuzzy from that night. To clear up about last night, I was rambling about Stile and the flood of emails I got from people asking if I knew what happened.

Email #1

but do you know what the fuck happened to Stileproject this time?! looks like some communist right wing christian group has taken over his page, but knowing Stile it could be a dumbass prank. and also, what is up with r33t.org? are they shutting down for real? i'm gone from the internet for 2 days and look what the hell happens!!!

Email #2

some christian site is up now saying he got arrested for letting kids see porn obviously thats not true but what the hell is? whats happened?

Anytime I see something screech across a room and latch onto someone's neck, and the guy screams and tries to get it off, I have to laugh, because what IS that thing?!

When the hell did you grow a beard? In the last two weeks? Fuck you! I'm 25 and I can't grow a beard to save my life, but you look like you've got fucking Arlo Guthrie on your chin. And you're like 17 or something. So now I'm all pissed off at you. At least my computer is still faster than yours. heh.

Okay, I haven't posted in a long ass time. And I don't have anything to say right now, either. How sad. DC is colder than a witches tit, and I'm going back Monday for two more weeks. Last week two homeless guys got in a fist fight over who would get to hit me up for change. That happened at the corner between the Dept of Justice building and the FBI building, no shit. After working hours its a fucking ghost town out there. Did anyone see the state of the union speech? I think Clinton called for the legalization of marijuana. About time. I could be wrong, I was kind of dozing.

I'm so fucking blazed right now.. If I wasn't so drunk I'd make a post about this whole stile issue and put a lot of readers at ease. But I can't cause I'm gonna pass out soon. So I'll cut through the shit.. Its fucking fake people.. He is cool, he keeps people on there toes, but it isn't real he will be back soon to entertain us all.

Saturday, Jan 29th, 2000

YETI@Home is a scientific experiment that harnesses the power of hundreds of thousands of Internet-connected computers in the search for giant ape-like creatures (YETI). We, the YETI team members who founded this experiment, are experts in the field of cryptozoology (the study of animals that do not exist).
You can participate in this historic study by running a free program that downloads and analyzes video & sound captured from your very own backyard.There's a small but captivating possibility that your computer will detect the faint footsteps of a hairy monster.

Why is it that when I was a kid, a Happy Meal really did make me happy. These days there really isn't anything food wise that just brightens up my life enough to make me smile. The idea of going to McDonalds or Burger King really doesn't appeal to me that much, and I always frown when I think of the bill I'm going to get whenever I go somewhere nice. There are no simple pleasures like there were when we were young. I'm sure you can remember how excited you were when it was Christmas, or your birthday, or mom said, "ok, we'll go out for dinner." These days holidays depress me, money stresses me out, and I have to work my fingers to the bone just to keep on eating. I guess that's why there's sex.

I'm with ya Zack, another saturday at work and it's sucking the big fat hairy, puss infected, herpes breeding, itchy rash infected PenIs. I really don't feel like pretending I'm a nice person today, I could care less if people can get there shit fixed or not. Speaking of work, I said 'fuck' to a customer on the phone yesterday which is a big no no.

User: I don't see anything that says 'username'
Me: Look at your screen what do you see?
User: Umm Password and umm..
Me: Stop! right there move your eyes up about 1 inch
User: Uhhhh... ummm.... ok..
(after about 5 mins of explaining the screen to him and that he should have a field that says 'username')
Me: Its real fucking simple the screen has username and password. Thats it.. It isn't trying to trick you
User: Oh.. You mean username..
Me: Yes
User: You guys should make it easier
Me: We cannot make it any easier. Any easier and it wouldn't function as anything, it'd just sit there.

(maybe I didn't say the last line but I always hint at it, whenever they say it should be easier) Saying fuck just slipped out, but we are suppose to be real chipper people. Oh well he was old and probably never heard the first word I said to him. He lied about what was on his screen anyways, old fucker kept rebooting the computer at random times when he got confused.

I can't believe I have to get up at 4 am on Saturday. Does that seem normal or right to you? I don't think so. I was just thinking about life and feeling a little cheeted, so here's a shout out to all the people that have to work on the weekends. One day we will have real jobs! We will not slip through the cracks and work thanklessly until we die! We will continue to strive forward until we get normal hours and decent wages! Or not!

I'd just like to pass this email and link onto ya'll.

http://members.xoom.com/afflictions
i know that theres too many sites like this already out there. but i'm not asking you for a plug or anything. just check the site out.
oh yeah, if anyone knows where i we can get a host for our site then e-mail me back.
thanks

Friday, Jan 28th, 2000

Over the next few days you may notice that the site may be MIA or routing to our server incorrectly. No need to worry, we have outgrown our current connection and have to move servers which is cool but cost more money. =( (paying compared to what used to be kinda free).. If over the next few days you notice things missing, or jacked up go ahead and let us know we need all the help to catch all these little bugs and make this as smooth as possible.

You know, I've never really liked being sticky. I mean a little sticky-wicky is good, if you catch my drift (nudge-nudge, wink-wink), but lemme get to the point here. For some fucked up reason (I personally blame having to get up for work at 4am) I decided that it was a good idea to make myself a peanutbutter and honey sandwich. I know you're thinking, 'mmmm, but peanut butter and honey is yummy in my tummy,' but give me a second to explain. Now for those of you who don't know, I've made a decision to walk to work, and this morning I was a little shy on time. So I grabbed my sandwich on the way out the door and proceeded to start eating as I beat a pretty fair pace down the dark streets. I was being pretty careful because I hate being sticky (*see above) and you know how honey is. Well I thought I was doing pretty well being careful and all, but then again it was as dark as good coffee on the street I was walking down. Then this car passed by and it's lights reflected off the myriad of shiny honey dribblets that were running down the front of my fleece and pants. I tried to get some of it off, but it just smeared around and got all over my hands. So to make a long story short I'm all sticky now, which is not my favorite thing (*see above).

Thursday, Jan 27, 2000

After playing around with Office 2000 I stumbled upon these settings:

Isn't that a bitch! If only I knew this screen existed long ago.

Why is it that I'm so fucking busy the last few days here at work?! For gods sweet sake people I'm trying to fuck off and not getting any time to do it! It's like the flood gate has been opened and the shit just keeps rolling my way. I can't seem to clear everything up before everything breaks again. I just don't know what to think. It's actually starting to feel like... well.... work! Unacceptable!

Ok, ok.. I know that the phonesex thing that Josh just posted has been posted a bunch of times before. No need to send me emails telling me about it. Might want to let good ol' josh know instead. He told me the reason he posted it is because he was the guy on the other end of the phone & he was a bit shaken up when he called in and his favorite girl #5467333 was in avaliable to play.

I've got this economics class where the professor pulls all his multiple choice questions from the course study guide. When I came home I gave myself two choices. (1) Review the material and see what kind of grade I get. (2) Take advantage of the fact that we are allowed 1 page of notes and type the whole course study guide in size 6 font. Yes I typed the whole damn study guide for chapters 1-4 onto 1 piece of paper. It's really a piece of art, Ironically typing up everything would of been the same technique I use for studying.

Wensday, Jan 26, 2000

Ummm what? Dude did you hit the bottle early today?

DAMN IT EOD! Now I gotta take a fucking dump after reading that!
Kinda reminds me of that kinda in American Pie...

Its bad enough to have to shit when your at work. Pulling out the paper 'O' to cover up the nastyness of the toliet seat, listening to the guy next to you drop his 'friends off at the pool', but when you sit down and look up at the back end of the door and what do you see? A big phat smear of shit in the shape of a Z. That just ruined it for me. Come on people lets not get excited when we goto the bathroom in public. I know work can be stressful but no need to start smearing shit all over the stall or all over yourself just calm down and wait until you get home.

I love it, free vend day at work.. All these glorious vending machines are on free mode, and its time to bust out my empty jugs and take my bonus. I've been sampling the free chicken soup stuff that comes out of this coffee machine. I'll tell you this much about it, ever had caffinated chicken soup? Thats right everything comes out of the same damn hose in this coffee thing so chicken soup tastes like coffee and coffee tastes like chicken soup. Mmmmm chicken coffee soup.. I guess I'm lucky the soda comes from a different machine.

Tuesday, Jan 25, 2000

Just doing my part for the war on drugs. ;) Organizations like Chuck Norris's Kick Drugs out of America don't even mention why drugs are bad, just don't question it, just believe it, DRUGS ARE BAD *AHEM*(ASS!), just remember drugs are bad because he says so. Course this organization isn't a total waste go ahead and check out his site it offers you to ways to send in some money and buy some shirts. Want some Anti Drug shirts? Goto Chuck's site here.

josh, would that be an african laden pussy? and do you mean right after said shaving, or an eighth of an inch of stubble later? inquiring PenIses want to know...

Okay, I have one fucking question for those pervs out there:
Do you like your pussy shaved nice and close?
[YES]   OR   [NO]

You make the Choice!

Monday, Jan 24, 2000

I had to reach way into the mailbag to bring you this.

No Doz rule. Way better than Vivaren which taste like shit to chew and when mashed and put in Dew only makes it flat. My record is 18 Vivaren in an hour. Which had no effect. Dont ask cause i dont know why my heart didnt blow all over my puter. Best caffiene incident was out of bordem and lack of suppy of brew i beer bonged a whole 2L of Dew. Fucking straight to the brain. well. hey. im boring ya im sure. keep the good work up.

-Z

REMINDER:I'm not saying go and throw out your illegal drugs, keep them, hold on to them, cherish them. The views of using legal drugs are just expressed for educational purposes.

I'm at work currently kicking back my 5th coffee, thinking about how much I could of spent on coffee per day (our coffee is free at work for another few months). Now a bottle of 60 pills of NoDoz cost around $7.00, and a cup of coffee ranges around a dollar or so. (depends if you homebrew it or pick up at starbucks) Regardless you have to taste your coffee so you wanna spend alittle extra to get it to taste the way you like it. Well one NoDoz pill is 100mg of Caffine which is about 1 cup of strong coffee. With each pill costing around $.12, you can save money and praise NoDoz once again. NoDoz is not only fun to mix with other substances but is easy on the pocket book.

This is just another friendly NoDoz tip from the penIsMightier Crew.(REMINDER: Double the dosage for double the fun)

Ahh! I just thought I would post just because of the fact that I haven't in a little while. I guess I haven't had much to say, or maybe I've been a little lazy. Oh well. Anyways I gotta get to sleep. I got class at 9:00am YUCK! Oh well! I will try to get my ass more into gear here and you should be hearing more of me very soon. Have a great morning everyone!

PS. Don't forget to read the morning comics!

Sunday, Jan 23, 2000

Well it looks like aherdofturtles is having a E/N of the year poll. We are currently ranked down there a bit right behind Solosier. Come on people! Lets vote for PenIsMightier, show your support. Hey if you like us and take the time to vote for us, I'll buy you a beer if your ever in Portland. btw the voting is real easy, when the poll page of the EN sites comes up just select on penismightier & hit vote.

Saturday, Jan 22, 2000

Yeah I put it on my lizard when I leave for work, so I can sit back and watch him escape every damn day. He normally escapes and sits on top of the other lizards cage. Had my day off from work yesterday, ended up watching American History X (which is a damn fine movie). I did have plans for updating the site, and fixing some stuff, but I ended up hanging out with friends, going to another movie (Dogma, which also is a good movie), and wasting time mumbling to myself.

Now I'm at work so anyone who wants to chat with a board tech go ahead and AIM me..
Aim name: gewdyit420

There's nothing I like better than pulling up the ol' site and checking the cams to find a great shot of EOD's lizard. You like to see the lizard too, eh, nudge nudge, wink wink? Yeah, I thought so.

Here at work, being a technical support supervisor, I have to listen in to the technicians taking calls and give them feedback on their performance. It's a hard thing to have to listen to these people that you try to be nice to and have to rip them new ass-holes when you hear the way they take calls.

Technician : Ok, type in www.yahoo.com and press enter.

User : Allright. (Sounds of typing for a second or two)

(Dead Air for 3 minutes)

Technician : Did it come up?

User : Uh... no.

Technician : Hunh... I'm gonna check something here for a second. (Puts customer on hold for 7 minutes)

Technician : You still there?

The whole time I'm listening to the call all I can do is smack my head against my desk and wonder at the frustration that most people calling into tech support must experience. I guess when you have no other idea what you can do it's the only way out, but often it turns out the people you call know about as much about the product as you do. Not to bad mouth all technical support, but I guess I'm just a little discouraged right now. I've been listening to this agent's call for almost an hour and he's just batting around the issue right now, no relief in sight. I'm in for the long haul here folks, wish me luck.

We "officially" launch tomorrow.

http://www.baefed.com
and if that doesn't get you inside, then
http://www.baefed.com/news.shtml
Just wondering if you would give us a plug, since we are "officially" opening. We would really appreciate it.
Any constructive criticism or comments would be welcomed. :-P
The site isn't totally finished but close enough.
Thanks a lot!

Ok there you go man. I'll let the readers be the critics.

Friday, Jan 21st, 2000

Well I caled in sick to work today, ok I don't feel sick, but I am Sick of the bullshit at work. So that makes it ok for me calling in sick and I am free any guilt. So maybe I'll knock out some projects for school, and redo that ugly left side bar of the page. Hey maybe I'll go force those people on the Weishaupt cam to move off the couch.

Speaking of Weishaupt I've been keeping in touch with him while he is working over in our nations capitol, helping out on some top secert computer stuff. He got a nifty pager from work that has its own email address, 2705806@pagemci.com. I think the pager has probably the standard 200 charater limit, so don't send him any novels. Feel free to keep him up on the news and current events or just say hi. Also send him some normal email I think the dude is getting a bit bored.

Wanna read something funny? I took this link from 5 Unruly but it is to funny for anyone not to read. Check it out here.

As a result of this new shift I've been working, I've been drinking more coffee than any person should ever drink. It's just like when I used to work at the coffee shop. I worked at Coffee People in the Portland Airport for nine months and it was the most thankless job I've ever had. The tips were good, but the job was so awful that it near drove me crazy. It made me drink like a fish and smoke more pot than I can even remember. I think that's where all the money I made at the time went.... Anyways, the point of this ramble is the caffeine. I used to drink four shots of espresso in a cup of coffee and then take a nap. Now I have to drink at least two or three cups of coffee to normalize in the morning. So for those of you out there who aren't yet caffeine addicts, take this advice : drink as much as you can early in life to build your tolerance so that you can't become sick off of over caffeination. Well kiddies, thats all the wisdom I've got to impart today. Check back tomorrow for another nugget of love from your pal Zack!

Thursday, Jan 20th, 2000

Well Stile has called it quits. And I don't blame him. Yesterday when we went to his website it simply stated... "I QUIT", well I've seen things like this before from Stile but looks like this is the last one. When I check the site this morning before I leave for my Economics class he has thrown up a bit of an explaination.

I'm sick of being used. I'm sick of being called names. I'm sick of being stepped on and lied to. I did this site on my own time and never asked for anything. Last night a group of people went onto DALnet and EFnet and proceeded to spam the fuck out of the entire network for five hours straight. Today I woke up to my cable disconnected and a message from @home's abuse "task force" on my answering machine. It seemed someone spoofed(?) my IP and made an ass out me online. They got tons of e-mails with chat logs and many complaints. My cable is out indefinitely until they can "revue" what happened, even though they say I'm still responsible regardless (for running an insecure box). Biggest fucking crock of shit I've ever heard. I'm depressed, exhausted and just totally burnt out. Even worse, I'm now on AOL.

This site was doing 25 gigs a day of data transfer, over one million hits this month, and i had no control over it's popularity. This server has been totally overwhelmed by the amount of traffic that it was getting, and it can't continue. I have a few days left before my account is deleted on this server, and that means goodbye stileproject. I've had totally free hosting up to now, but it's coming to an end. I've also been getting tons of crank calls, and some sick fuck left a dead animal(pictured to the left), or something that looked like it with "STILE SUX" on a piece of paper attached to it at my front door today.

That was just a brief snip of his total rant. The main reason I posted this up is because this is important. Their are some key players to the E/N community and Stile was a very important figure. Shit I need to catch the next bus and run to classes. I hate to cut this short and with stupid grammatical errors but fuck. Just lettin' everyone know.

Hey Stile you can always come make some guest appearances on our site.

*Eod pours a fourty ounce on the ground* "For all my dead homies"

I think I remembered what I was thinking this morning while I was walking to work. I was thinking how much it sucks having to walk down a highway shoulder to get to work. What kind of screwed up urbanized area do you have to walk down a highway to get to work? I have two other options, but neither of them seem very appealing. I could choose to walk about two miles out of my way on some semi-lit roads with no shoulders, or I could walk through the creepy-ass nature park in my backyard. Let me tell you something about how much I would like to go walking through a nature park at 4:00 in the morning. I don't think I can think of anything that would creep me out more, short of actually being chased by an axe-weilding lunatic. It'd be like way too reminiscent of Blair Witch for me. I know there are deer in there and I don't fancy the idea of walking through a forest in the pitch black listening to things moving around me. The only possible way I'd do it is if I loaded up my Mossberg 12-gauge and carried it in hand with a flashlight strapped to the barrell. And since I would then have to walk the rest of the way to work on a normal street (and into my workplace for that matter) with my shotgun, I don't think that's much of an option. Well, I'll be back at ya'll later.

It always feels like I have a million things to say while I'm on my way to work in the morning. Must be part of waking up at the ass-crack of early and walking in the frigid cold for half an hour. It really gets my brain a churnin'. Of course then I come into work here, sit down at my cubicle and strip off the layers and proceed to lose all of those creative juices. I don't know how it works, but it's pretty disappointing. I think to better serve all of our loyal readers the mighty Zack is going to start bringing a tape recorder with him on his morning walks and recording the random string of consciousness that flows freely at that time. Much of it is bound to be a little frightening and ugly, but I think we're all ready for it. So buckle up race fans it's gonna be a bumpy ride!

Wednesday, Jan 19th, 2000

Whew, good thing someone is porting linux onto his n64, I was getting worried that I wouldn't have enough linux in my life. Seriously, soon I'll get a lilo boot prompt when I turn on my microwave. Actually this is a good thing, if WinCE does end up controlling our house hold applicances we will have a another choice with linux. I'm also thinking of taking the web site off this 333mhz box and putting it onto my n64. I had always felt that administration of the server would be so much easier if I could use the n64 controller with my rumblepak. Hell if there is something wrong with the server I just turn off the system, blow into the cartridge and start it back up (works on my zelda64).

Read about it here and I snagged it from the boys at /.

So I started my new shift today. I work from 5 am to 4 pm. I have to get up at 4 in the morning. Apparently I got out of bed when the alarm went off, because I am here, but I have not the slightest idea how. I have a vague recollection of leaving the relative warmth* of my apartment and stumbling the couple of miles to work in the freezing ass cold. Yes folks, Zack has decided to walk to work. I feel like a lump of shit if I don't ever get off my lazy ass, so this gaurantees that I feel better on a regular basis (that and there's no parking and I'd have to take a shuttle bus from a remote location that would probably take me just as long). Anyways, I'm making it through my first day alright. I haven't passed out or anything and it's almost noon! Of course it's also been crazy slow, so we'll see how it goes in another couple of days.

* We are poor, so relatively warm means about 45-50 degrees.

Fans of SNL should really enjoy this:

       3.5 MB                           4.4 MB

Tuesday, Jan 18th, 2000

Albert Fish: "We had lunch. Grace sat on my lap and kissed me. I took her to an empty house in Westchester I had already picked out. When we got there, I told her to remain outside. She picked wildflowers. I went upstairs and stripped all my clothes off. I knew if I did not, I would get her blood on them. When all was ready I went to the window and called her. Then I hid in the closet until she was in the room. When she saw me all naked she began to cry and tried to run down the stairs. I grabbed her, and she said she would tell her mama. First I striped her naked. How she did kick, bite and scratch. I choked her to death, then cut her into small pieces so I could take my meat to my rooms, cook and eat it. How sweet and tender her little ass was roasted in the oven. It took me nine days to eat her entire body. I did not fuck her, though I could have, had I wished. She died a virgin."

"I always had a desire to inflict pain on others and to have others inflict pain on me. I always seemed to enjoy everything that hurts. The desire to inflict pain, that is all that is uppermost... What a thrill that will be if I have to die in the electric chair. It will be the supreme thrill. The only one I haven't tried.... I am Christ! I am Christ!"

Richard Chase: "The first person I killed was sort of an accident... The second time, the people had made a lot of money and I was jealous. I was being watched, and I shot this lady --got some blood out of it. I went to another house, walked in, a whole family was there. I shot the whole family. Somebody saw me there. I saw this girl. She had called the police and they had been unable to locate me. Curt Silva's girlfriend --he was killed in a motorcycle accident, as a couple of my friend were, and I had this idea that he was killed through the syndicate, that he was in the Mafia, selling drugs. His girlfriend remembered about Curt --I was trying to get information. She said she was married to someone else and wouldn't talk to me. The whole syndicate was making money by having my mom poison me. "

Ed Kemper: "If I were seeing this patient without having any history available or without getting the history from him, I would think that we're dealing with a very well adjusted young man who had initiative, intelligence and who was free of any psychiatric illness...In effect, we are dealing with two different people when we talk of the 15 year boy who committed the murder and the 23 year old man we see before us now... It is my opinion that he has made a very excellent response to the years of treatment and rehabilitation and I would see no psychiatric reason to consider him to be of any danger to himself or to any member of society."

Greetings from Wasington, D.C. The job goes well, and thanks for all the non-existent well-wishing, you fuckers. At any rate, just dropping a line to remind everyone to check Transmeta's web page tomorrow; in theory, the most secretive of all computer companies is set to reveal the specs of their "Crusoe" chip tomorrow. For those of you that don't follow such things, Transmeta has been working on... well, something for the last several years, but they haven't told anyone what it is. All that we do know is that they've got big backing (Paul Allen is providing funds) and big name talent (they currently employ Linus Torvalds, inventor of Linux). The only info they've released up til now is that Crusoe will be "cool hardware and software for mobile applications." Since Transmeta has caused only slightly less rumor-mongering than a pregnant nun, I might as well throw in my two cent's worth: I think it will be a memory/ processor array whose instruction set can be modified at runtime. In other words, an architecture that doesn't rely on separate hardware to perform separate tasks, but instead has one big processor that performs hardware functions described in a BIOS or similar chip. Imagine if changing from a Voodoo2 to a Voodoo3 were a software upgrade that didn't require purchasing new hardware. Imagine if you could double your entire computer's performance by doubling your CPU. Course, that's just my wildly inaccurate guess...

Monday, Jan 17th, 2000

Well, in two hours I'll be on the longest, and presumably dullest airline flight I've had to take yet, to deposit me in the Nation's Capital, aka the slum near which the abhorrent people who rule us live. Updates will be sparse on account of the IRS's curious notions of network security. You know how frustrating it is to sit in a room full of massive servers and fiber-optic cabling, and have to check your mail on a 33.6 dialup? It sucks. Fuck your precious network security, there's pr0n to be downloaded. In the meantime, email Cyd and tell him to get off his pustulent ass and set up the webcam.

Oh shit! fucking I really hate fucking CGI. I just spent the last two fucking hours trying to get a fucking 20 line CGI script to work. You know why it didn't work!! It was all because a fucking "/" was in the wrong place!! DAMN!! Oh well! Live and learn huh? Ahhh! I am sooo glad today is MLK day! NO SCHOOL!!! YEAH BABY! Oh shit! My fucking stomach hurts bad, I think I should eat something. Hmmm how about some yummy NoDoz. I can almost taste that minty flavor now..............

Sunday, Jan 16th, 2000

Alright Brain, you don't like me, and I don't like you! But lets just do this, and I can get back to killing you with beer! Anyways us Americans can easily and safely express to their congressional representatives their concerns about their government's misguided and ambiguous drug policy via the web page:

http://www.house.gov/writerep

Well, this is my last day of R&R before I have to return to the glamorous life of the business traveller. Looks as if I'll be spending the next month or so in our nation's capital, so if you live in the neighborhood, for chrissakes email me and tell me a)where the good strip bars are, and b)where your sister lives. Just kidding on the last one, her phone number'll be fine. In other news, in the last two days I've endured two consecutive failed attempts by my roommates to set me up with people they work with. First my roomie Terry tried to set me up with a cocktail waitress named Ursula, who was hot but uninterested, and then Cyd tried to set me up with his boss Michelle, less hot but equally uninterested. Attention Bence: Any amateur can fail when the odds are against you. It takes a true loser to have everything going for you and still fail. Not only have I got a high-paying job and the body of a greek god (well, one of the wussy greek gods, at any rate), I've even got a pick-up line: Baby, you looks so hot, if I raped you in Texas I would get acquitted. Not sure why that doesn't seem to work.