Receive Bill I receive the bill and strategically throw it in a pile by the door. Here it sits and ages until it is mature enough to migrate to my computer desk. Never ever open it write away, this will spoil the surprise of the due date.

Computer Desk Once on my computer desk it begins the second aging process. This one is a bit more involved that the first aging process. Piles of various scribbled on papers, and books must be placed on top of the bills, enough to cover the bills up so that they see little to no light. Again it is to early to open the bills up. It's easiest just to forget about them.. That’s what I do.

Opening Bills When the pile of papers begins to grow, I decide to clean it up by sorting out what I need and don't need. This is when I find the bills in a nice mature aged state. This is the time that I open them.

The Bills This is when it gets tricky. After opening each bill you must read the 2 most important parts. (1) The Due Date, and (2) The Amount Due

(1) The Due Date
The due date is the first thing you must check. You need to know how much time you have before you need to send the Bill in. One of the most important things to remember is the actual month you are in. Remember if it is June 3rd and the Bill is due January 21st you don't have half a year, you are most likely half a year overdue. Don't try to wait until January 21st rolls around again.. I tried it.. They don't buy it..

(2) The Amount Due
No matter how much is due, always pay about $.13 more than the bill cost.. Why? I dunno but I always do.. I like seeing the $.13 credit on my account. And you will to..

Opened Bills Now that you have your bills open, it's time for the last few steps. You need a Pen and your Check Book.. Typically I keep my checkbook hidden under the same pile of papers that was covering my Bills. (Lets be resourceful here, no need to waste perfectly good pieces when you can recycle the other ones. Reduce, Recycle and Reuse).. After you locate your checkbook, you need to find a Pen. Preferably one with ink in it also. Best thing to do, is to wait.. Since you have your computer in front of you, turn it on and browse to PenIs take a load off.. You've been working hard on paying bills. Wait a few days before finding that Pen.. While you’re at it, mix the bills up and shove them into a mixed pile with the stack of aging papers.

4am Thursday Night Good god, you never paid those bills! Jump up from your bed in the middle of the night and stumble into the room with the bills. Crash and trash everything around on your desk and uncover the bills. Once you find the bills, get your lazy butt up and find a Pen.. If you can't find all your Bills, this is normal, they will turn up after a few days. Pay what you can find.. Now it's time to write out the various checks and put them in the envelopes with the checks.. I can't stress this enough, the bills you’re sending back need the checks in them.. After you write out your checks (sign them please, makes things easier), and seal up the envelopes, grabs your stamps.. what? You don't have any stamps.. Don't ask me I don't have any either.. Best just set them on the table by the door so in the morning you'll be reminded that you need to make a quick trip to the store to get stamps..

Morning Wow waking up in the middle of the night sure threw off your sleep pattern didn't it? OH CRAP YOUR LATE TO (Insert Job or Class here)!! Run around and put on the clothes you wore yesterday, grab your keys and run out the door.

End of Day Whew what a day.. Looks like you got some mail.. Best start the aging process and throw the bills on the table by door.. You won't forget about those bills you paid sitting under the new bills right? Course not, you'll remember it in the morning when you go to get the stamps.