I come not out of spite for the Republicrats in our current two party (read one coin) political system, but in the hopes that a true alternative in the new hypertext universe may get its much needed voice.

It isn't because I disagree with Al Gore, who supports NAFTA, WTO, the death penalty, the Cuban embargo, increased Pentagon spending, sleazy HMOs, greedy hospital chains, 250 million guns in our homes, more bombing of Iraq, the rich getting richer and the rest of us declaring bankruptcy. For that matter, it's not because I disagree with G.W. Bush, who supports NAFTA, WTO, the death penalty, the Cuban embargo, increased Pentagon spending, sleazy HMOs, greedy hospital chains, 250 million guns in our homes, more bombing of Iraq, the rich getting richer and the rest of us declaring bankruptcy, it's because I believe that of the two, there _has_ to be a third choice.

And that choice is PenIs.

When the question is asked, "PenIs, have you done drugs?" the answer will be a resounding "Yeah, you got some?", rather than "er, um, next question." When the question is asked "PenIs, what do you think of abortion?" the answer will be "Especially in the case of ignorant fools such as yourself!" instead of "er, um, next question." When the question is asked "What about foreign policy?" the answer will be "Give everyone a computer and access to midget amputee porn." rather than "er, um, potatoe."

Now I know, some people may ask, "How can a web site become president of the United States?" Well, that's a perfectly valid question. I would even suggest that that would be a question best answered once we get PenIs elected. Once we get PenIs elected to the presidency, it will become president, so the question will become moot! Sexism will no longer be an issue, because PenIs has no sex! It can't! It's just a web site! Would it not be far safer to elect a website president than some testosterone driven MALE! For those who might question the effectiveness of something other than a testosterone driven male, consider the name. PenIs! What greater a symbol of testosterone could one ask for! Even if, by being a website, it can have no testosterone, it would still stand for the most extreme symbol of the testosterone ridden male that exists!

Of course, there is the second meaning of the sites name, in that the PenIsMightier. Given this, it should be the first duty of the site (once elected president) to replace all armaments in the military with writing implements. Far more damage could ensue than from any silly war. The new state of warfare would be the Flame! And the Spam! And the Lawsuit! If every member of the United States military were given Pen's for their Mightier use, consider the havoc that could be wroth! The courts could be so tied up by frivolous lawsuits that no REAL DAMAGE could be done!

For my own part, I fully give myself to the cause. I personally volunteer to be this websites campaign manager. I already know of three people who would rather vote for PenIs than Al Gore or G.W. Bush. I think, "hey, three out of four people I have asked, that's a 75% approval rating!" If we can keep this momentum, it would be a virtual LANDSLIDE!!!

So join the winning team, and just say no to the status quo, just say no to the over publicized male contenders, and just say YES to PENISMIGHTIER!

I know this site has my write in vote.

Ciao,

Puzzling.