Over the past few months I have turned into a lean, mean driving machine. In the course of becoming this machine, I have become a more aggressive driver. Why? Because I have places to go, and things to do. If you can't keep your slow moving SUV in 1 lane then I'm going to honk and let you know. I'm not honking with anger but honking to alert you to check yourself (ie green light, your drifting half your car into my lane and pushing me onto the shoulder, etc)
Today on my way home from classes as I approached a red light I noticed it turn green but the car in front of me failed to take notice. They seemed to be concentrating on the nonexistent traffic of the other street. So I slow down behind them and stop, checking to make sure there are no peds in there way and I give them a little toot of my horn. At this point the angrily proceed on. At the next light they pull next to me and the passenger is just freaking out and his window is down.
I roll my window down, I look over with an inquisitive look on my face (one eyebrow raised)
Passenger: We where waiting to make sure no traffic was coming before we took our free turn! You know nobody has to take the free turn!
Me: Yes I noticed the wait you guys took.
Passenger: Why honk at someone, you could cause someone to get into an accident
Me: On a green light you are suppose to proceed in a forward motion with your vehicle. Was there a particular shade of green you and your female friend where waiting for?
(The look on the guys face was classic. He looks over and starts yelling at the female driver.. At this point I noticed we had argued ourselves into a green light. ha)
Source:Telegraph
THE strongest evidence so far to back the suggestion that men who spend hours seated are more at risk of infertility is published today.
I you like this article/topic you may want to check out:
A French team reports a significant rise in scrotal temperature when men remain seated for long periods, for instance in a car, which could affect sperm count and quality. This rise could explain studies showing that sperm counts in professional drivers are lower, that their sperm have more abnormalities, and that their partners take longer to conceive.
Bike Saddles bad for men's libido
Exercise blamed for testicular cancer
Heatwaves produce more boys than girls
Out for the count
Cycle saddles at the seat of sex problems
Could you imagine going in to get rectal surgery, and your doctor's nametag says Dr. Zorro
below his name? HA! Next thing you know you'll have someone's initials in your ass crack!
I have a question for you. Would you let someone carve their initials into your stomach
for a million or two? eh???
Refresher: For anyone that doesn't remember this, a while back there was a doctor somewhere
in the US that apparently carved his fucking initials into a patient during surgery! I think
it happened sometime around the beginning of the year or so. Anyways, it seems that they have
just convicted this fellow who is dubbed "Dr. Zorro." He lost his medical license forever,
and was sued for 5 million. They apparently settled for a mere 1.75 million.
ok, to make up for the lack
of epiphanies this weekend, here are a cogent string of them in the form
of text found in old saint paul's church in baltimore, circa 1692:
| Tuesday, May 30th, 2000 |
Ethan Anderson's Top 10 Signs Held Up at Game 4
1) "The House the Jackals Built"
Eod and I have been working night and day these past weeks
to come up with exciting new additions to the Mighty Pen.
Specifically, his job is to come up with a Staff link,
and my job was to make fenomas make the new logo bar.
I'd say I did a pretty good job. But above and beyond
that, in my spare time, I've patched up
jeer's
old perl image.cgi from the defunct furth3r. To you, the
valued Pen Is Member, this means that now I can
be an evil sadistic prick and display my images
on a spearate page, eventually with banners on them.
Why would I do such a horrible thing?
Well, because Stile does it. And furth3r did it,
and lots of other web pages do it. And I have a
strong need for acceptance. It's kinda sad. So without
further ado, I give you: the Twelve Steps of PenIsPix
Addiction:
1. I
am addicted to penis-related pictures that are in some way
humorous
So there you have it. Mail
me
now if you think the image displaying script sucks, cuz barring
unforeseen circumstances, it'll be on everything in a week or two.
All suggestions are welcome, but flame mail can be directed to my
complaint
department.
While rifling through the favorites folder, I came
up with a list of pointless links for your
enjoyment. See, this saves you, the PenIs Member,
from having to search all over the internet for
pointless links. Why? Okay, I won't lie, these
are specifically for people seeking to waste time
at work. Down with the man! And just to ensure
your surfing pleasure, I think I managed to keep
these almost 99% porn-free. Go grab a cup of coffee,
ause to recollect your dearly-departed three-day weekend,
and get with the time-wasting carpal-tunnel-inducing
clicky-finger motion.
I got an email from the kids over at kramp asking me to check out and possibly link there site. While checking out a few things there I came across this great link.
Encyclopedia Brown and the Case of the Pirated Mp3's
Weishaupt and I have been working on many new PenIs projects lately. Keep
an eye out for new features and articles for the site. In the mean
time
it's time for everyone's favorite.. Midget porn! Midgets are the
perfect
gift for any occasion. Sure, full sized Gimps are the standard, but when
it comes time to storing them, where you gonna put them? Having trouble
thinking of a good place? That's because the size of a standard gimp is
way too big.. Not so with midgets! They fold up and fit nicely in your
closet or
even under your bed. Midgets are Small and Compact and very easy to travel with. Feeling a bit down about the size of your PenIs? But you just can't afford those costly surgeries, well, midgets are
easy to fill making you feel like king of the world. They'll be begging you to stop before you know it.
Having trouble convincing the wife that a midget would be better than a new dog or even a child? Don't worry women love midgets.
It's great family fun, hey look at gramps go..
We don't hear any complaints from ol' gramps do we? Sick of the traditional birthday games? Treat your birthday friends to a real treat.
There's a bunch of lesbian potheads over at my apartment, and eod and
his girlfriend as well, and something we were all talking about just now
reminded me of how my Dad taught me to drive. I was sixteen, and
I had just gotten my learner's permit. I had had a few driving
lessons, but I hadn't really been out on the street much.
Me, Dad and my brother were driving up
to Chicago to spend the weekend there (I don't remember why),
and it was about 5:30pm on a Friday afternoon. Fifteen miles
outside of Chitown, Dad pulls over on the shoulder of I-5 and
tells me to take over. Now, you have to understand, traffic on
the Chicago freeways during rush hour is like a traffic jam, in that
all the cars are two feet away from each other; it is unlike
a traffic jam in that all the cars are going 70 mph. I would have
felt fairly comfortable attempting this feat if we had been
driving in my car (at the time, this was a
1984 Pontiac station wagon), it already had plenty of dents.
Unfortunately, we were driving in my Dad's Infiniti J30, which was less
than a month old. To be honest, I thought my Dad had gone schizoid,
because I thought my odds of making it to 5th & Ohio without at least
a fender bender were a shade worse than my odds of suddenly making the
Infiniti achieve flight. It was harrowing, and I got cut off more
times than I can count, but I navigated the loop without putting a
scratch on the car. I learned something that day: that my Dad is
willing to risk his own life and the lives of his only children to
teach me to drive well.
Source:NyPost
Read more?
Hey check out this awesome little game. It's got hot raunchy chicks, guns and violence, skanks lots of skanks. Its your job as Sir-pimps-a-lot to show these hoes what your made of. I can't stop playing it, it fucking rocks.
Download:Now
(left) A textbook grip for the bowler that wants make that strike every time.
Today while I was staring at the wall in the lunchroom at work I noticed a Life
magazine on the table. I picked it up and opened it to a random page. The pic
to the left is what I got. I thought that since we have had all the hype from our UK
audience that I would should a little part of the culture, Rugby! After the poor guy
had his cranium violated, he simply got up, rubbed his eye and kept on playin'.
That's a serious fucking sport! If that where to happen in an NFL game, our American
player would have been like suspended, or fined big time.
Gotta go drinkin' now!
Wow, our UK visitors broke the hitcounter last night. Thanks,
fellas. And while I'm on the subject, insane mad props
go out to Seanm_420, who
was the one who emailed our link to Dot-comedy. Sean,
in return for your noble actions in pimping the mighty Pen,
I reward you with this image: use
it wisely.
Alright here is your chance to chat with a real live female.
I'm at work and my GF is bored. Go ahead and IM her at libra2277 on AIM or ICQ her at 68658110.
That made yesterday seem like a good day, made up for all the shitty stuff that happened the day before right? Wrong coming home from work at 1am I get pulled over for doing 80mph in a 50mph zone, cop didn't seem to happy that he had to pull me over.. He almost wrote me a ticket for reckless driving as well as speeding and he mentioned something else but I couldn't understand him (we are on the side of the freeway, not really a place you can chit chat). Funny thing is that I was just going the with the flow of the traffic. He didn't seem to care but I did. So now I have a court date, I'll try that in court. Also this will seriously jack in my insurance.. Course my insurance is registered in Washington and I got pulled over in Oregon.. Anyone know how that would work? I'm trying to stay positive but it seems that someone is testing me lately..
Hey thanks for coming to the site and stealing a bunch of stuff. Thats our
aim at PenIs, to find or create semi original content and then have 12 year
olds jack it.
So apparently we were on tv in the UK yesterday. Sort of.
A program entitled
Dot-comedy mentioned us, for some
reason or another. Because we're so comedic, I guess.
So, um, just ignore my big rant about Napster,
we'll return to the usual hilarity
shortly. Anyways, to our Brit visitors: Oi! Sod off, you! I
just got off a six-hour bartending
shift. I'm not a bartender, but a friend of mine just
bought a tavern, and he's having trouble staffing it, so
I'm helping out.
The bar is a piece of shit dive, not much more than two pool tables
and beer, and it's
in a, shall we say, working-class part of town. Even better,
I've had to break up 2 or 3 fights every night I've worked.
Fortunately, it's pretty easy to break up a fight between
two chronic alcholics. Tonight, some guy came in, and he
must have been drunker than Ted Kennedy on Memorial Day. So
I tell him he's not getting any beer, but he can sit and
drink coffee (because it's raining, and I'm just a big fucking
softie). Maybe fifteen seconds later, when I turn my back, he
takes a swing at some chick. For no reason at all. So not only
do I have to throw this sodden fucker out of the bar, I have
to try to keep the chick's boyfriend from beating the shit out
of him. Or, at least, I have to try to get the two of them outside
before the actual ass-kicking takes place, so that the cops don't
shut the bar down. I was eventually successful, but the point of the
whole story is that bartending isn't nearly as cool a
job as one would think when one hasn't bartended.
p.s. bomb-ass not-so-brief comment, weishaupt. and as i am fond of
saying, if not for the poetic beauty of the grotesqueness insinuated,
at least for the brief flash of horror which passes across your eyes as
you react with distaste as your mental artists illustrate my
not-so-ill-intended compliment: if you had a box, i'd chow it.
Lars Ulrich, Metallica drummer and part time
expert on internet law, has been appearing on
numerous talkshows lately decrying the apocalyptic
horror that is Napster. Now, I know he's already
taken alot of heat over this, but I want to pitch
my own two cents in on this one. As usual, I have five points:
1) First of all, Lars, don't give us this
song-and-dance
about how Metallica cares deeply about the rights
of musicians and music fans. If Metallica cared about
music fans, they would have stopped recording new albums
in 1993. And don't insult our intelligences - despite
the best efforts of MTV, there are still a few of us
that make our decisions without consulting our
favorite rock star.
B) Secondly, stop discussing whether or not music
fans should be "allowed" to use Napster. It's a
moot point, because the lawyer
-whores, with all their
money and power, cannot stop us. I won't go into
detail on why they can't stop us, but in a nutshell,
it's because there's a billion of us, and we like music.
If Napster gets law-suited out of existence, there's
a dozen waiting to take Napster's place. The music Execs need
to spend a little less time deciding who to sue, and a little
more time finding new ways to sell music.
III) Look at the Grateful Dead.
No one is more commonly bootlegged than the Dead, yet
they make more money than any other band (well,
they did up until whatshisname died). The Dead understand
that their least devoted fans are the ones who
buy Grateful Dead CD's in a mall. When Metallica
persecutes Napster users, they're persecuting their own
biggest fans.
four) Lars tells us that he's not
concerned about the money, he's concerned that Napster users are
trying to usurp control of the music. Well, look who
we're taking it away from: record companies! The same record
companies that cheated the Black musicians who made them rich.
The same record companies that stretched disco from a two-week fad
into a ten-year ordeal. And the same record companies who
turned Metallica into the bunch of golf-playing pussies they
are today.
Epilogue) In conclusion, I repeat the
credo from my rant on DVD's:
Wow! it's really amazing, all the violence in schools these days. It makes me kind
of glad that I went through K-12 school system when I did! No one ever in grade school, middle
school, or high school ever made threats or violent acts against others like what's happening
today. It's sad, it really is...
On the eve of the Lake Worth tragidity I come to find out that someone from my high school "Franklin" in
Seattle has made the local crime section. It seems that a girl needed money for prom, so
her and some friends decided to go and burgle a home for some extra cash. You can read more
about it here.
To everyone who inquired about my shitty day.. Yes it got a bit better.. Today is a great day, after my morning classes I spent a good part of the day watching North Shore (80's movie about surfing the North Shore.. Complete with thugs, girls, and 80's music) and whats this, as I'm getting ready for work, The Babysitter's Club is on. Darn I'm gonna have to miss this episode on a count of having to goto work. Damnit and this was the one where Stacey has her big crush. (Good thing josh has this one in his video archive.)
Source:Washington Post
You heard it here first on PenIs, err or I hope you did.. Yes that is a legit news article from a legit source. A bit vague but thats all that has been released..
It's also rumored he was a devoted reader of the crapper. but thats just a rumor and you know how evil rumors can be..
put a stereo in karmalina yesterday for $420 so no one could say my stereo
was worth more than my car. now, i'm going to go play cars with my
friend, and put the other racing seat in front, fix the loose bearing,
check the fluids, wet sand the body, paint it, and detail the whole car.
happy birthday to me, indeed. i'm bringing a digital camera, so i'll try
to throw pics of my new woman up so if ya see me driving around, you will
know to stay the hell out of our way, or karmalina might imperceptably
beep her horn at you.
Alright, if you don't have the multimedia flash plugin, go
get it now so you can see the glorious title bar I made.
This was incredbly fucking hard to get to work right, but now that
it is running I can tweak it without so much difficulty.
By the way, other posters: Sorry I didn't warn you guys. Take a look in the
appropriate directory and you'll see that the random phrases and links are drawn out
of text files, so feel free to add to them. (Try not to leave empty lines at the end.)
Otherwise mail me and tell me if it sucks or not.
What happened? How come? Was it something we said?
It would seem that jeer has shut down
furth3r. He said he didn't
enjoy it anymore. Well, that sucks, he ran a
pretty cool page, but I guess I would stop posting if I
got AIDS, too. Shit, I wasn't supposed to say
anything about that. Personally, I find working on an e/n site
tremendously entertaining, but hey, different
strokes for different pens...
Every couple months I get one bad day where everything turns to shit. It started slowly yesterday where I show up for an exam in the morning and the subject matter is nothing close to what the syllabus indicated. In fact the subject matter is from 10 chapters ago, so I search my brian banks and try to answer the questions as best I can. I race home and begin pounding out a paper thats due the next day but I only have 2 hours until I have to leave to work so after pounding out a few pages I email myself the paper to my work address and race off to work. Great nothing but traffic as ar as the eye can see, I cut and weave through the traffic and just show up in time.. I go to open my drawer to grab my headset and my key won't go in. After many failed attempts and I end up finding a headset on the floor and boom I'm live on the phones answering stupid questions all night.
"I thought your cd had the internet on it!"
After a fun filled night of calls I'm ready to race home and try to finish up the paper of course it is 1am now and I'm beginning to run a little low on resources, soon I will need sleep and food yes food I forgot to eat. Ohh but wait, my tire is FLAT! WHOOOPEEE!!! At this point I didn't care anymore, I grabbed my flash light went back got my friend from work and we begin to pull off the rear wheel to put the donut on. What do you know my tire iron breaks! HAPPY DAY! Lucky my friend has his and we loosen the wheel off and put on the donut. I limp home in my car and run in to start work on my paper, I sit down and look at the time.. 2:30am and I have to get up for class at 8:00am, I pound out about 30 mins worth of bullshit and fall asleep.. Wake up and head to school, pull into the school parking garage (For which I pay $250.00 a quarter to have access to) and whooopeee parking structure is full.. Oh goodie goodie, I drive 2 blocks to the next one and its full also, man somebody upstairs sure likes me. I end up driving a few blocks down and paying to have my car parked in a garage not anywhere related to my university. Few lectures, turn in the paper. Now comes some more fun I recently ordered a new sport suspension setup for my car (that was a whole ordeal in itself with ups loosing my address) but I figured my bad luck is over and its time to treat myself... I'll get it installed today before my GF gets home and then we can go out to dinner.. Found a nice shop that does work on german cars, look up the directions in mapquest and I drive out there. Well when I looked it up on mapquest everything appeared normal. They forgot to note that the place was out in the sticks. After driving out to the boonies, I drop my car off and find out that I have 4 - 5 hours to kill with nothing in site but a dirt road, some abandon cars and a k-mart in the horizon. Lucky the light rail system (MAX) was only about 3 blocks (I'm estimating since there where no structured streets) and hope the max home. On the way home I watch as we drive from Camero land to Camery land.. The max is pretty empty and I take this time to relax, and reflect on the day.. Ohhh but guess what happens? Some old scarey, smelling, festering bum sits down next to me. There are about 20 free seats with nobody in them and he sits next to me. Why me? Why not someone a couple rows up or possibly an empty seat. What is so damn attractive about me that I have the freaks always sitting next to me. So I spend the rest of the ride home listening to this old man, mutter to himself and scream out various nam flashbacks, racial slurs, and something about the government. So here I am back in my safe apt, and the phone rings, its the shop, hopping they got done early and my bad luck is done for the day they inform my that my pads on my brakes are near gone and I'll probably need to replace my rotors.. The grand total for all the work is ungodly and needless to say this day is far from over. After I get my car back safe home, I'm not moving the rest of the night..
since i've started posting on PenIs, i've been kinda idealistic in
that
although i don't come up with an earth-shattering epiphany every day, i at
least speak from the heart, and hope that maybe i could actually reach
someone with one of them. well, the following email has helped bolster my
confidence that i am doing just that:
thank you, my flock of black sheep, for reading, and for letting it be
known that pouring my heart out on a site as diverse as this one isn't all
for naught.
p.s. i'm goin' to seattle for the weekend, so i will post if/when i can.
whatever happens, wish me much sex
and happiness this saturday, my
twenty-fifth birthday! =>
The purpose of this post is to argue the point that jeer made
back on the 18th, when he argued that bla-bla is like
NBC. First of all, bla-bla is like NBC in that
it's a commercial operation, with advertising. Yeah,
we're sell-out whores. However, bla-bla is unlike
NBC in that it's not censored and they're not assholes.
For them, it's a brilliant idea- why bust our
own asses creating content, when we can just offer
free web hosting to poor webmasters, and let them do
all the work? It's a good deal for us, because we
get unlimited space and bandwidth, with no censorship -
and if they ever tell us to remove a picture, we'll pull
the site like internetus interruptus and host it off
my quake server if we have to. What it comes
down to is that NBC creates and owns their own content, and thus
controls it. Bla-bla is in the opposite position,
completely dependent on its hosted sites. In fact, thi
only difference between bla-bla and any other company that
offers some service for free in exchange for hits is that
bla-bla recognizes the existence of the e/n community,
and has chosen to support it. That, in itself, is a good
thing, and large part of the reason why we decided to move there.
And this is kind of off the subject, but while I've got a
good head of steam up, I'd like to comment on a related
topic: Stile-bashing. Alot of small websites have tried to
generate controversy by talking shit about Stile, calling
him a sellout and so forth. For
more or less the same reason that peasants complain about
the King. A couple of thoughts on that:
Good Goddess, people, it's May 23! A very important day to
us Erisians and Discordians and other spiritual non-Euclideans.
So how am I going to celebrate this holiday? By fucking some
girl I met over the net! Hopefully. A few days ago, some
girl sent me this ICQ:
Nothing spells good content and good updates more than porn, gore and sick humor. Without much furth3r ado. Random image time! Remember kiddies bring your parents into your bedroom and ask for permission before viewing.
Remember, old PenIs is as good as new PenIs.
Say, anyone have some Candy? I know Eod does! He has a little candy drawer! Oh yeah! you know
what I'm talkin about!
Well This has been a wast of yours and my time!
HAVE A GREAT DAY!
Okay, if one more fucking person emails me to tell me I
should go read this funny new site called The Onion, I will cry like a litle girl.
It's not a compliment people! Know your
history!
It was quite a party last night, thanks Eod. I'm still stuffed.
I worked on my "real" job for eight straight hours last night...
Let's hope I don't have to do anything like that again for a long,
long time, it was hellish. I know, many people do that five times
a week, and I pity those people. Unfortunately, I'll soon be one
of those people again, because I need a job. You see, I'm broke.
Tapped out. Skint, as the mangy Brits would say. So, I've updated
my resume: tell me what you think.
Name: weishaupt
peace, my flock of black sheep. speaking of
farm animals: damn, weishaupt, sometimes you are just too funny.
I'd like to speak to you for a moment regarding a legal
difficulty which has been much on my mind. First of all,
I'm a large man. Not fat, not
excessively tall, just not small either. Like 6'1" and
190 or so, whereas the typical man in this world is about 5'6", 140.
Women are even smaller, on average. Now, this means
that, through no fault of my own, I have to eat more than most
people, just to stay alive. Is that fair? No, of course not,
but I've learned to sublimate. The question now before us is:
what is the government going to do about it? I'm handicapped,
goddammit! When others are cursed by nature with bad genes, an
undesirable skin color, or a crippling disorder of some sort,
the handouts come rolling in: so where's my grocery subsidy?
I propose the founding of the Federal Department of Victuals
for the distribution of money, food, and industrial-sized cooking
equipment to naturally large (not obese) people. It's the
right thing to do, and a tasty way to do it. Thanks for your
time, be sure to remember the Big-Boned Subsidy measure on
your ballots this Tuesday. Wait, I mean last Tuesday. Fuck.
Never mind.
Alrighty there is a point when a lot is toooo much.. Our office needs over
time hardcore, so they opened us up to having overtime anytime for a while.
Well since its a 24-7 call center some people are working some crazy amounts
of hours. To bribe us to work more, they have been bringing in a steady
supply of pizzas and soda.. (about 15-20 larges every 6 hours or so)..
I'm all about free things, I mean why buy the hot dog when you can just load
up some relish in your hand for free? So I'm just stuffing as much pizza I
can into my body. Taco Pizza, Pepperoni, Canadian Bacon with Pineapples,
Sausage, Cheese, and various other ones. I'm afraid there little trick for
overtime worked.. I'm too stuffed to get up out of this chair.. So I have
no
choice but to stay here planted in this chair and work some overtime until
all the pizza is gone and I can walk again.
UPDATE: Ahh fuck it.. I don't think I can eat anymore pizza, I'm stealing the rest and going home.
Looking for an affordable laptop? Looking for a laptop that has been blessed and endorsed by Josh?
Now you too can own a laptop just like Josh does.. Pretend to be josh and write pretend updates.. How much? $19.95.. Check it out.
This just in: moments ago, as I was banging on my keyboard,
the gentleman on what NBC humorously refers to as a news program
informed us all that there's a Terrible New Virus! (you could
just hear the capitals) It's like the ILOVEYOU virus, but,
and I quote, "It Destroys Hard Drives, and It's INCREDIBLY
Hard to Detect!" First of all, it doesn't destroy your hard
drive, it destroys the miserable collection of chain-letter
emails and low-quality porn you've collected on your hard
drive, and that was probably worth destroying. Secondly,
it's easy to avoid: don't double-click on your emails, dumbfuck.
Thirdly, can something really be called a "virus" when it
can't replicate itself without help from a stupid person?
Anyone can write an executable program that destroys files
and then email it to someone; the only difficult part (if
any part could be termed difficult) is convincing your
pathetic victim to double-click on something they shouldn't.
That's not a virus, or a trojan, it's social engineering.
Customer: It ain't working..
Harsh words indeed, though I don't claim to understand the
shark tangent. That missive came from Bah_Mee, a guy who I play footbag
with. Rollover the link, feno, you'll love his email.
Say what you will about Bah_Mee, he can hit
a Double-Over
Down, and that ain't easy. However, to return to the
subject of the article:
You said that people who've read Grey
are pretty cool. Well, I'm here to tell you that
not only have I read every issue of Grey, I own every
issue of Grey. In fact, I own two copies of issue #2,
of which there are only a few hundred in existence.
I acquired these graphic novels, or comic books as our
forefathers once said, during a phase of my life when
I was keenly interested in comic books. Do you ever
recall me getting any pussy on account of my keen interest
in comic books? Me neither.
Fun Eod Fact:
The Gall bladder was removed 6 years ago and so far no complications have
come from it, besides an upset stomach when eatting nasty greasy food.
Which I hear upsets everyones stomach.
What does this mean? Well I shouldn't eat many fatty foods, it just makes
my liver work overtime. but other than that I should be a few grams
lighter from it.
So what did we learn from all this? That Chicks dig scars.
Source:Excite
The girl, Candace Newmaker of North Carolina, told the therapists seven
times that she could not breathe and said six times that she was going to
die.
Seriously, that would be the shittiest way to go, reliving your birth?
What was wrong the first time I did it?
(April 16th, 1997)
Since it has been forever since I posted, (I'd post all the time if I had a
cool automatic posting script thingy written by a
L4M3R..) I decided to write yet
another article instead. It's called
i saw this post by those crazy cats over at guruchild, and just had
to share it.
How to beat the Napster ban
1. Uninstall Napster
Source:Telegraph
Go check out this ZDnet article on the possibility of
a bounty for individuals and ISP's who hunt down and turn
in sources of spam. So much for my web-based business
opportunities. I can only imagine how many legal battles,
false accusations, and so forth this would cause. On
the other hand, the US Congress has a pretty good track
record for insuring that any internet-related law they pass
is totally toothless and ineffectual, and there's no
reason this would be any different. I've said it before,
and I'll say it again: The only type of organization that
manages to spend more while accomplishing less than a government
is a religion. (Link stolen from slashdot)
Next time your in an airplane and you have to pee, you could be gambling with someone elese's life!
"This unfortunate woman was found dead on parkland in Yorkshire, England. She's believed
Hot shit! Slashdot tells us that Stevie Case, world's hottest
grrrl-gamer, hot-shot designer for Ion Storm games, and girlfriend
of John Romero (he wrote Doom, dumbass) is in this month's Playboy.
Wanna take a look? Yeah,
you know you wanna take a look. I probably don't even
need to mention what I think of girls playing Quake,
but then again, I never really knew any girls who liked
video games - until I met jeer from furth3r.
And incidentally Josh, the story below kicks ass... but where
are the photos???
With the help of josh's horrible misspellings we found ourselves on webhelp.com a site where you can feel free to ask a live "search wizard" and they will find you the websites you need.
My question:Where can I find those online hookers I saw on 20/20?
A Web Wizard will be with you shortly
Well I give stacey a 1 out of a 10.
Question: I need the website address to a cool website called pen is mightier
Click here for his chat
i leave town for one weekend, and all hell breaks loose! the trailblazers
lose two at home, and random publicity caused a surge in hits and post
quality. well, since i was gone for so long, here are a bunch of relevant
and not-so-relevant links to keep your bored butt busy.
2) "Huff, Puff and Blow the Shaq down"
3) "Whaq Shaq! (Where's Tonya?)"
4) "Beam us up Scottie"/"Scottie for President"(follow the link and
click on the erotisme button, you'll thank me.)
5) "Drain this Lake-rs"
6) (Behind the Lakers bench) "Section
102 Game Plan Harass a-Shaq"
7) "Everybody Stare At the Ref"
8) "It's my First Game in 85 Years Make it Good!"
9) "Jackals Shaqal
Lakers"
10) "Hey Refs, Give Phil his Own Whistle"
2. I truly
believe that a higher power can save me from staying up all night
staring at pointless cartoons
3. I
have made
a decision to turn around my pathetic behaviour
4. I
understand that weishaupt doesn't really know the 12 AA steps,
and will be making it up from here on out
5. I
will
conquer my disgusting fascination with feces
6. Friends
ask meto stop showing them disturbing pictures, but I keep
doing it
7. I will
stop downloading picture just because they have boobies
8. weishaupt
snagged this from some venezuelan chick that checked her email
in his apartment
9. I swear and
affirm that some people take bondage a bit too far
10. I
will
not shore up my own flagging self-esteem by looking at pictures
of weird people
11. I'm
absolutely
done with getting high on marijuana and then chortling insanely
at poorly-drawn x-rated cartoons
12. I
have
admitted my humorous image addicition to our lady Eris, and asked her
to look the other way
Secrets that no one cares
about.
What do fratboys give sorority
girls on Valentine's Day?
Creepy dolls and lots of
'em
What's the Bureau of Alcohol,
Tobacco, and Firearms' position on Potato guns?
The Horrifying
Repercussions of Steamybutt
In 4000 AD these'll be
religious relics.
Diary of the world's smartest
sperm-donating schizophrenic
This'll come in handy
when they make "JonBenet: the movie"
A man who makes
piles of rusting bicycles for religious purposes (follow the links at
the bottom, this guy is totally out of his skull)
"Specially selected meat trimmings of
beef and/or pork?" - Really? Special in what way?
A child's first
introduction to the decomposition and decay of dead folk
Try to guess the crucial element missing
from this company's business plan.
What's wrong
with some people?
This is the 1% porn I mentioned
earlier.
The Tuma family website - you'll
be needing to hit Alt-F4 shortly
The email I sent the Tuma
family
Monday, May 29th,
2000
"Do not be frightened, young children, I am Lars Ulrich, powerhouse drummer for Metallica, and we are needing your help, Encyclopedia Brown."
"All right!" Encyclopedia said, grabbing his bike. "Follow me."
Sunday, May 28th,
2000
WASHINGTON - Operation Protect Elian has cost taxpayers $1.4 million and is growing by leaps and bounds, government officials said.
After taking Elian at gunpoint from his Miami relatives five weeks ago and flying him to meet his father, the government's chief job now is to protect the 6-year-old boatwreck survivor.
That task involves about 70 government agents at a cost to the taxpayers of $120,000 a week, according to officials in the Justice Department.
The security team consists of about 50 U.S. marshals and 20 deputized agents from the Immigration and Naturalization Service, officials said.
Shatterday, alternately william shat-nrrr
day, May 27th,
2000 -- day of the cyd fun fact for brits:
On American TV, all english cops begin all
conversations with, "Oi! What's all this, then?" Why is that?
I've never seen the Dot-comedy show, infact I never knew it existed but I got a few emails and aim's that informed me about the show:
Eod - just a quick message that you guys were mentioned on the piss
poor TV show called DotComedy, which is screened over here in the UK
on Channel 4. They even skimmed (quickly!) through the Crapper.
They skimmed through the crapper, on tv none the less.. Sounds like my kind of show.
cat fight #1
--- cat fight #2
--- cat fight #3
--- cat fight #4
--- cat fight #5
--- cat fight #6Here is a threatening email I got today:
>Hi! i have a page also and i steal a lot of stuff from you page..... so
What a way to open an email.. Looks like you have a page, oh and its a Geocities page even.. I think my 7 year old cousin has a geocities site also.
>that people will like it.
> Please don't get angry! i just wanted to let
I kind of feel honored if I inspire random acts of theft
>you know what you have influenced me to do!
> thank you!!
Your Welcome
Love, Eod
>I've added you to my links section so you'll have to do the same
Oh man your links section... 'you'll have to do the same' Why do I have have to link you? Because you have no original content and you steal most of your content? Or is it because you have those awesome geocities banners? Or is it that your content plain sucks? I'm not going to insult readers with a link to your page..
well, i spent all day
getting my car roadworthy and sanding, and the weather did not permit
painting poor karmalina. i got to seattle at about 11pm, and
entered the most schizophrenically beautiful home i've ever seen.
i'll have to put up a pic or two so your brains can hurt at least a
fraction of the amount of mine. i am staying at a friend's mom's house
during convergence. i was greeted at the door with a smelly
squishy present from the dog. but anyway, here i am, and maybe i will
actually be able to get the picture i took of myself in this
methodically beautiful madhouse to ftp with the crappy ms ftp proggy.
if not, i'll fix it tomorrow when i have time to download stuff a real
ftp proggy on this cludgy 'puter. time to read a little more of the tibetan
book of the dead and go to bed.
Friday, May 26th,
2000
You are the corps. We are the geeks. Alone, we are weaker than you. United
and connected, we are far, far stronger than you. You don't own the music
and the movies - only the right to sell them. This right is useless if we
choose not to buy. We're honest people, mostly, and when you offer a good
value at an honest price, you will thrive. When you try to strong-arm and
gouge us, we will steal what we want, pay you nothing, and you will
perish. You spent years and millions of dollars developing a new way to
cheat us, and a sixteen year old kid defeated you in his spare time. Give
it up, and be grateful we allow you to make any profit at
all.
LAKE WORTH, Fla. -- A middle-school student shot and killed a teacher at school Friday on the last day of classes, police said.
Wow thats some journalism..
The student was arrested.
The shooting took place at Lake Worth Middle School.
No information was immediately released about the student or the teacher.
Lake Worth is just north of West Palm Beach.
See dick run.
See Jane run.
Dick runs fast.
Thursday, May 25th,
2000 
Man! And I thought that
I wasn't having too hot of a day! I'm sorry Eod. If it makes you feel any
better I had something not go to
right for me today. Some time after I woke up today I decided that after smelling BO for long enough I would
go and take a shower. Well after about two minutes in the shower I noticed that I was standing in about a half
of foot of water! Great! the fucking drain was plugged up again. Well it ended up being a race, I had to finish
the shower before the tub filled. Of course with a non-water efficient shower head that just wasted the water the
race would be close! Anyways 10 minutes later and about one or two feet of water I was done. It's amazing how nasty
old shower water looks when you're done. Well after drying off I went to put on some socks. In the process of putting
them on I noticed the all to familiar circles of missing skin on my feet! (To insiders, this is known as athlete's foot.)
So! not only do I have a clogged drain! I also have athletes foot, I think...
Anyways, I'm sorry you're having a bad day Eod. If it makes you feel any better, after I read your post I tried to
call you and ask if you wanted a ride back to the shop.... Sorry man!
"Where is my email?!"
"The last tech BROKE my computer now YOU get to fix it"
"I'm some fucking prick from NJ and I need to yell and scream everything to you"This is pretty odd for me, to be writting a complete stranger.
But I read your daily epiphany for Sunday the 21st, and
it really hit something deep inside, I have felt many of the things you
mentioned. Thank you for sharing that part of yourself.
Best wishes for your 25th. A gemini, huh?
~fir
another weird syncronicity about karmalina, while working for the census,
i have had occasion to drive both g.g. and karmalina to a particular
apartment building in town in order to survey the residents. each time, i
have locked my keys in my car. (dumbass that i am) the first time, i ws
able to jimmy g.g.'s passenger door open. the second time on tuesday was
much less fruitful. i used a hanger to try to jimmy the back window open.
it's a 2-door car, so the back seat windows only open about an inch or two
at the back edge by popping out a little lever. once i succeeded in this
task, i rammed my arm as far as it would go through the opening, to find
myself still a couple inches from the door lock. once i decided it was
not going to happen, i tried to get my arm out... to no avail. it was
stuck at the elbow. i tried many painful methods, the most painful of
which finally "worked." in an attempt to pull the window out abit to
give my arm some extra room, i shattered the window, showering my arm and
car with broken glass. i'm ok, minor cuts. but i had to duct tape
plastic bags to karmalina, a demoralizing task to say the least. then i
was driving around wednesday from junkyard to junkyard looking for a
replacement window, when i heard a loud whistle directed my way coming
from a tire shop. the guy wanted to know if i wanted a window. he had a
moldy crusty old 83 nissan sentra in the back, and decided to start
parting it out, beginning with me. well, i paid the man $25, he helped me
install it, and i was suddenly very happy. as weishaupt put it yesterday:
"you are the luckiest person i know when it comes to things like that."
yes i am, weis, yes i am.
Wednesday, May 24th,
2000
i just realized today that both times i have made a serious attempt at
quitting smoking, something happens to the g.g. ride (my first car, a gold
1981
buick skylark, the initials stand for: grumpy grampa, it works when it
wants to), and i then find myself driving a five-speed manual,
keeping my driving hands too busy for smoking. pretty sweet. the first
time, the day after i came from the west coast on my trip which decided
that i was to move here, g.g. was stolen whilest i was delivery driving.
so, my boss let me drive his toyota celica. now, g.g.'s front paws are
doin' tha splits, so i'm drivin' karmalina.
1) Stile's not a fucking sellout! Do you know how
much money he would have if he'd started selling t-shirts
six months ago, when Howard Stern was mentioning him on
the air every other week? If he's trying to make money,
he's the least competent businessman I've ever seen.
He is a hit-whore, but the act of making a web page
is an attempt to get hits.
In conclusion, if you want to build yourself up by tearing
others down, save it for your inter-personal relationships;
calling Stile an asshole only makes you a smaller person.
That being said, Stile used another of our pictures
without linking us, the asshole.
2) I am sick to death of seeing people who run a "shocking"
website who say that Stile's lame, or better yet that
he used to be cool, but is now lame. Keep posting
pix from rotten.com, sonny, but shut the fuck up about
stile, because you're dancing on a stage he built.
3) If you're going to say stileproject sucks, at least
fucking elaborate. What is it about Stile that sucks?
Be specific and use a thesaurus. It's not like it's hard
to legitmately talk shit about Stile: maybe you should
start with the fact that he insults gays and minorities
and posts disgusting pornographic movies.
Tuesday, May 23rd,
2000 
Totally bogus. I drove my ass all the way across town for three
hours of not having sex. Would've been a totally pointless
trip if she hadn't gotten me high. As is noted in the post below,
that chick specifically promised me nookie, and yet here
I sit, unblown and undone. She got a phone call from her girlfriend,
and then kicked me out because she didn't want her girlfriend to see
me there. Whatever that means. What's the problem? It's not like
we did anything. Either her
girlfriend is the violently jealous type, or she was telling
a thinly-veiled lie meaning "Wow, you're much stranger looking
in person. Could you leave now?" We'll see if she calls me
again. In the meantime, I'll try not to bring this up again
unless a)I succeed in weaseling my way into her pants, b)I get
a picture of an intimate portion of her body with something
humorous written on it, or preferably c) both.Update:Hey Eod, where'd ya find that
Lenore picture? Stile posted it
about seven hours after you did. We shouldn't get on his case
tho, he's been hurting for hits lately.
Interesting subject for a web page. I'm in Portland too.
Thought I'd
say hello. Maybe you're a cute guy that likes casual sex as much as
me?
Got my attention! But is she a flake, I ask myself? Only one way to
find out: my own special brand of amateurish flirting, to wit:
Her: I'm burnin without you.
Who could resist that? So, to cut to the chase, I'm on my
way over there in an hour or so. Now, why is this important to
you, the Pen Is reader? well, first of all, if I got laid my
posts might not be so whiny. And second of all, because I plan
on telling this girl that I won't fuck her unless she lets
me write something amusing on her ass and take a picture of it.
Only problem is, I haven't decided what. How about "weishaupt
was here"? Or, "My Pen Is Mightier"? Suffice it to say, if I
get nookie tonight, you guys get a picture. No promises, though,
I'm about as experienced with women as I am with OS/2.
Me: ummm, burning dope or burning with unrestrainable
passion?
Her: haha. Well, dope.
sorry to have skipped yesterday's epiphany, however, i was out working on
my new car! i am now the proud owner of a 1983 nissan sentra, and
by my birthday this saturday, it ought to look pretty sweet. i pulled out
some racing seats from the junk yard yesterday, EOD is setting me up with
racing pedals, it's got sweet brand new racing tires, and nice wheels.
today, i will replace the back right bearings, and plan to have it painted
jet black with a green pearl clear coat by friday. the engine runs smooth
and sweet, and the body is undamaged and has never been wrecked. for
$450, this is quite the primo car. i named her yesterday: karmalina. finding her was the direct result of a good deed i
did a couple of months ago, and plus, she rides down the street smooth as
caramel. anyway, i'll work on getting a pic of karmalina up for y'all.
p.s. does anyone know the quabalic significance of the date today?
Ahh! I should be sleeping right now, but hey what the fuck! I'm up so I thought I would
make a quick post. A post about what? A post about nothing! Nothing at all. I'm just wasting
a little of my time right now and wasting your time. I wish I could be sitting on a sunny beach
some place wasting my time. Then I would feel that the wasting of time would be more just.. What do
you think? Is this a senseless wasting of reading and web space? Most likely. Oh well I
have nothing elese better to say right now, so this is what I'm saying. Not much.
Monday, May 22st,
2000
Objective: To find an exciting, dynamic career in an
office environment chock-full of young, blonde hotties.
Skills: You know that internet thing? I do that.
Business Experience: I have a Mighty, Mighty PenIs.
Additional Experience: I porked your sister, and that was
quite an experience.
Contact Info: Email me through the website. Don't use
the phone number I gave your sister, it's a fake.
Sunday, May 21st,
2000
well, i spent all night rearranging my room, sort of a physical
manifestation of my mental housekeeping lately... but it was a bit deeper
than that. ever since i've had enough of a sense of self to soliloquize
(ie. order the unseen universe within my conscious by using spontaneous
language and thought as a tool), i've had a place facilitative to this
process at which to perform this ritualistic sort of mental self
maintenance i adopted in order to get by. however, i have not yet found
nor created such a place since i've moved to portland, which, ironically,
is 90 minutes or less from almost any category of beautiful natural
formation. i am finally comfortable in my room, i am finally becoming
comfortable with myself, i am finally surrounding myself with a world in
which i can be comfortable: not because i am saying who cares to the bad
things which happen to me, but because i am nearing cusp of being who i
want, and using what happens around me (good or bad if good or bad there
be) as a tool to get what i want without negatively affecting the universe
or those around me. i'm nearing the place where one rides the fence
situationally between "using bad to benefit you" and being a martyr:
using your notion of "fuck you" with as much justice and minimalization as
possible in order to protect your really laying yourself vulnerable and
giving of yourself to those who are not parasitic to the process, though
that is decided situationally as well. creating your own utopia is
possible if you are not deluded with dichotomous notions and stuck in tha
matrix, deluded with bullshit notions of perfection and straight answers.
the previous statement was true, a lie, and meaningless, but it still
really meant something ;P. example: while i
was riding "the max," the wonderful electric train i use to get downtown
on the weekends, i witnessed the following scene. a mother on a bench sat
next to her bestrollered child. the mother had a short attention span,
and did not, at least in the few moments in which i witnessed her
interactions with her child, seem consistenly interested in fostering the
development of her child. she would present a toy, jiggle it around in
front of her child, then lose interest in playing with her child, and look
out the window. meanwhile, the child is frantically looking for the toy
she had just seen dancing before her. she soon begins to cry, so the
mother turns from the window and begins clapping in an effort to distract
the child. it works, and the baby starts trying to clap with one hand.
(heh maybe i should end it right there, but i want to put a bit more
effort into my story than a zen master might, call me a coddler) the
mother feels badly that the child is not "succeeding" in clapping, so she
tries to patt-a-cake with the child so she can clap. the child, surely,
i
thought, was far too young to be showing the reactionary amount of anger i
witnessed. the baby freaked and started getting midieval on her mom's
ass, then hurt her hands striking her mom, and started crying, seeking
comfort from her mother, which, thankfully, the mother gave her.
alternatively, my friend's newborn baby, whose development is
continuously, productively, and lovingly fostered, was recently sitting in
front of a speaker when a sudden blast of way too loud music assaulted
her. of course the child was intially startled, but instantly later, was
dancing around, singing and smiling. i want to be the second mother and
the second child.
Shit. I should be working, but Eod has the barbecue
fired up, with chicken, steak, and the flesh of young
virgins! Okay, young virgin cow-women. Should
be tasty, at any rate. Eod should be turning the webcam
towards the festivities later on, so keep an eye out for
the chips, and the salsa, and the beer, and the eating
of meat products, and the beer, and smoking of
weishaupt's wonder weed, and the various potato salads,
and more beer, and finally, the orgy.
Currently, it's 1am and a lot of the staff has cleared out, so I turn on
the computers next to me and assign them to various tasks. One of course is
for work, so it keeps up with relevant work programs. The other one is
my
music entertainment, it's playing mp3's, and the Mac crashbox with it's DVD
drive is currently playing The Matrix. Ahhh I think I'll stuff some more
pizza and overtime.. I'm not leaving til all this pizza is gone..
Saturday, May 20th,
2000
well, i may have found a new car to buy. i'm distraught, however, as this
1981 shit brown buick skylark was my first car, and i'm giving up on it.
it was given to me by my grandfather, who drove it off the lot. anyway, i
plan to buy a nissan sentra for $400. my car mechanic friend has a friend
who is selling it. supposedly, it's a sweet car. it was supposed to be
set up for today. however, my friend fell asleep and didn't call me to
let me know it wasn't going to happen today. of course, i had planned my
entire day around him telling me earlier that it would. i realized today,
that few things try my patience more than flakiness. if you say you are
going to do something, do it or inform the people it affects that you have
changed your mind beforehand. how difficult is that? apparently quite,
since most people i run across can't get outside their own heads long
enough to extend common courtesy. i suppose i need to learn to be more
tolerant of such things, since it seems they are unavoidable. this one is
going to be a toughie. possibly harder than quitting smoking, the
decision of which, today is the one week anniversary. wish me luck.
Look at it for a minute, it'll resolve. Busy busy
day, today running goddamn errands, and I walked up to the
bank just as it goddamn closed.
I see an employee ushering a kindly old couple out the door,
and I ask, "Are you still open?" And the bank employee chick
looks at me like I just whipped out a gun in one hand and my
dick in the other, and slams the door shut, and locks it
immediately. On the one hand, I was taken aback, because
shit, I'm not real scary looking. On the other hand, I was
thinking, "If I'm so awful, why did you just lock the nice
elderly couple out here on the street with me?"
Friday, May 19th,
2000
Me:What isn't working? Our new version of *omitted for job security*
Customer: Yea
Me: Ok did you download our software or install it from a cd?
Customer:Huh?
Me:Did you go onto the internet and download our software or did you install it from a shiney cd? (Yes Shiney CD makes
a difference.. In their world there is the square black cd and the shiney round one)
Customer:I dunno..
Me: What do you mean you don't know. Did you just say you installed it 5 mins ago? You had to start the install from
something.
Customer:Yeah?
Me: Yeah..
Customer: Hmmm
Me:You don't remember that far back?
Customer:Nah
Me:Ok do you have our software on a cd?
Customer:I dunno.
Me: Could you possibly look?
Customer:I dunno..
Me: Do you want to work with me on this?
Customer:Sure..
Me: Well I need to know how the software was installed
Customer:Ok
Me: Well? Did you put a CD into your computer at all before you installed it?
Customer:I dunno
Me: Did someone start the install for you?
Customer:I dunno
Me: Ok you actually installed the software on your machine right?
Customer:yeah
Me: and you where the one who installed it right?
Customer:yeah
Me: Ok open your CDrom whats in there?
Customer:huh?
Me: The cdrom.. could you open it and tell me what cd you have in there?
Customer:Who wants to be a millionaire
Me: Ok since that has nothing to do with us I assume you downloaded it.. Do you remember connecting to the internet to
get the copy of our software?
Customer: Nah..
Me: I don't think you installed it.. Try again
Customer: Aiigghtt coo..
i knew today that something would happen to my car. i've had nothing but
cars on the brain for the last few weeks. then i surprised myself today
by knowing that i knew something was going to happen today. that
information did me no physical good, however, my axle just plain broke.
but i guess at least i was mentally prepared... now, hopefully i can get
my car fixed sometime soon. hopefully this weekend because i need my car
in order to do both of my jobs. maybe the mechanic who owes me lots of
car work and $300 can find a few minutes this weekend to help me out...
but i won't expect anything.
Excellent article as always, fenomas, and what I like is
how you obviously went the extra mile on the html and formatting.
And incidentally, have you found a place to re-locate your trove of
Max Headroom information? Unfortunately, it is my sad duty to inform
you that we received a bit of hatemail on te anime/manga article. Yes,
already. I've reproduced it below for your edification:
> about manga and anime!!!!!!!!!!! I would write him but
> I don't want to waste my breath on someone who can not
> realize the difference between american and japanese
> cultures, lifestyles and content!! Sure there are some
> cheesy anime and manga titles but how come all americans
> can think up is Biker mice from mars(with some dumb girl
> who hangs out with mice who say things like"hey babe get
> on my ride and lets go") or we have street sharks and
> wouldn't you know it there is some babe who hangs out
> with, good heavens, shark dudes?????
Thursday, May 18th,
2000
Did you know that I, Eod, have no Gall Bladder? What you say only
grandmas get there gall bladder removed? Well move over bacon cause this
spring chicken had his removed at the tender age of 15. After 2 days of
extreme pains in my side, the doctors found out that my gall bladder was
failing. After removing it, I got the benefit of having small scars on my
stomach and well yes, the pain being gone was nice also. These scars are
now used as visual aids when I tell my heroic
fish tale of how one day I was jumped by a gang of thugs, while trying to
save 3 kittens from a burning houseboat, during a flood. Remember:
Chicks dig scars.
today, while working for the census bureau, although i have been warned
both about tardiness to meetings and about productivity, i risked being
late to my meeting with my boss and risked being fired due to that or low
productivity because i was enumerating a lonely old lady who really just
needed someone to talk to for a little while and i stayed and talked to
her for a bit. i work in mental health by day, and am to whom my friends
and family turn for someone to talk to about their problems. i am a teacher
and a healer by nature. that is my purpose. i am honored to have a
purpose which has such an immense capacity for being a good influence for
the whole. i hope to do honor to that choice. i hope i helped that woman
today.
DENVER (Reuters) - Police Thursday arrested three people for conducting a
controversial "rebirthing" therapy on a 10-year-old girl who died after
being wrapped in a blanket despite telling them she could not breathe and
was going to die.
The procedure, aimed at helping children who cannot form bonds with their
parents by making them "relive" birth, was captured on closed circuit
television on April 18 while the girl's horrified mother watched in a
nearby room, according to the Jefferson County sheriff's office.
But instead of unwrapping her, the therapists said "you got to push hard
if you want to be born -- or do you want to stay in there and die?"
The girl, who was adopted four years ago and had been treated for
Attention Deficit Disorder and depression, lost consciousness during the
procedure and was rushed to a local hospital where she died the next
day.
According to an investigator who viewed the tape there was a 20-minute
lapse between the time the girl's last breath could be heard to the time
she was unwrapped.
Wednesday, May 17th,
2000
Does Watching Anime Make Me Cool?
Enjoy.
Posted by Guruchild at 12:57 pm EST on 5/17/00
2. Delete all Registry keys that have NAPSTER in them.
3. Search for the following key:
HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\Software\CLASSES\CLSID\{CAD8C813-1F34-1B3E-00CEAE43FF0AAD}
and make a note of the ID# value. This ID is what lets Napster know a
banned computer is trying to log on.
4. Search for this ID# and delete all instances.
5. Install Napster.
6. Create a new login and use a different e-mail address. Don't use the
same login ID or you may have to start back at step 1.
7. Only share directories without Metallica and don't download
Metallica.
8. Tell Metallica to go fuck themselves. And never buy Metallica
again.
today, while i was trying to find peace and listen to myself, to come up
with an epiphany for the day, i noticed that all i heard from that voice
inside myself was: "i want a cigarette!" it took some serious meditation
to get beyond that simple thought. this became my epiphany. how am i to
grow when i fill my idle moments with idle activities? i'm not used to
listening to myself, and cigarettes are a big part of the reason.
whenever i had time to myself, i would spend it smoking, and removing
myself that extra layer from the core of my consciousness. i'm workin' on
it, and soon, i will be growing by leaps and bounds.
TWO Japanese teenagers have been charged with leading a gang that extorted
more than £300,000 from a classmate over eight months.
The accused boys kept their 15-year-old victim in constant fear by giving
him beatings that twice put him in hospital and covering his body with
cigarette burns, state prosecutors say. The victim initially told his
mother he needed money to help a friend, but even when it became clear
that he was being threatened she continued to draw on her late husband's
life insurance.
In all, 10 youths have been arrested, but because they are juveniles none
has been named. The teenagers are said to have used the money they
extorted to pay for long-distance taxi rides, dining out, gambling and
prostitutes.
This is yet another picture of Stevie Case, aka killcreek,
the world's tastiest Quake player. I probably shouldn't
admit this, but I think I want that projection-screen Doom
system behind her more than I want the woman. For those of you that
missed the last time I mentioned her, a whole day ago,
killcreek is the girlfriend of John Romero, one of the
guys who wrote Doom, and she can reputedly beat him
at it. Aside from that, she's ludicrously hot. The reason
I bring her up again is that Mindspring was
kind enough to point me to this
archive of luscious killcreek pics, so make with the
clicky-clicky and go check out the woman men dream of being
fragged by. If all video-game-playing girls looked like this,
Doom would be a televised sport. 
to have been pierced by a shaft of frozen urine which had fallen from a leak in a toilet
facility of an overhead plane."
Tuesday, May 16th,
2000 
well, it's been 3 1/2 days since i last smoked a cigarette, and wow, has it been easy. i've not been
extra cranky, i've not really even felt as if i've been tested much at
all. can't my addiction put up a better fight? if i'd known it was going
to be this easy, i would have done it sooner. oh, wait, i did quit for 9
months, the day i came back from my trip out to the west coast from
illinois in 1998 to decide where i was going to live. what made me start
again, you ask? losing my first love. i know, i'm a romantic,
destined to settle or be lonely. anyway, enough about *my* bleak future,
let's get back to changing yours. i just keep thinking that in order to
be successful in the next aspect of my life, i need to become my will, to
self-actualize. and i definitely can not do that and
smoke because i happen to not be ok with the idea of being a smoker,
knowing that my grandmother died of emphysema, my aunt is in the process
of dying in the same fashion (in a complete state of denial, still
smoking, and refusing to use oxygen, essentially killing herself with a
willful blindness.) and my mother has smoked for years and years. but of
course, somehow this was not enough to make me quit again. i had to just
kind of do it on a whim. one would think it would be tough, living with
weishaupt, the human
chimney, and terri, who is doing her best to smoke enough to get
enough miles to get the marlboro iron lung. so how did i find the
resolve? i did recently read the way of the
peaceful warrior, and excellent inspirational book by the author of
these linked lectures. i have also always been able to use
chaos which i create to my
advantage. but that's an epiphany for a later day.
workin' for the census bureau, i've learned just how insecure "security"
buildings can be.
i already knew, from my 2 year stint as a delivery driver, that they were
easy to get into.
i just had no idea that the residents would just offer info about fellow
residents so readily.
don't get me wrong, it has made my job a lot easier, and i don't believe
it's really hurt anyone,
i'm just surprised, is all. after all, these are the same people who paid
extra for the extra
protection they feel their security building has offered them.
eod: Thanks
Stacy: Welcome to WebHelp.com. My name is Stacey. Just one moment while I search for your request, Eod.
eod: a/s/l?
Stacey: I'm sorry but I am not authorized to search on that topic. Anything else I can help you with?
eod: I need this address to a website called pen is mightier.. but I forgot the address
--Session ended--
Guy: Welcome to WebHelp.com. My name is Guy. Just one moment while I search for your request, Eod.
A Web Wizard will be with you shortly
eod: Thanks guy
Guy: http://maf.mobile.al.us/~navymars/national/publicity/Fore N Aft/1999/990505.htm
Guy: Is this what you were looking for?
Guy: Is the information I sent you useful?
eod: great... I remember the site was this specfic name.. it was called pen is mightier
Guy: [Item sent - 1CThe Pen Is Mightier Than the Sword]
Guy: Thank you for waiting. I have located some information regarding your request. Please review it and let me know if it is beneficial to you.
eod: Yeah beneficial if I wanted to fall asleep, btw whats taking you so long witht he replies. Make with the click click
Guy: Do you know the whole name to the site?
Guy: Is this it?
Guy: http://members.aol.com/RitrsPulse/Pen.html
eod: no but it's kinda close..
Guy: What does the page deal with?
Guy: http://www.chebucto.ns.ca/CommunitySupport/Men4Change/write.html
Guy: Is this what you were looking for?
eod: Men 4 Change? what kinda happy horseshit is this?
eod: oh I found it... http://www.penismightier.com I found it.. Man I should have your job..
--Session Ended--
and Josh actually got a correct reply.
